HOW TO CHANGE THE WORLD
Each of us can make our corner of this world different and better. Can you imagine what it would be like if everyone, or even most, did? We can smile, help, open a door, encourage, pick up trash, give food…
HEALING, IS IT WORTH IT?
Here is my correct website: www.drdonnalamar.com Healing from trauma gives us an excellent new start in life. We can get discouraged and need to remember why we are working at healing. Here are some reasons: When we choose it, we…
MORE ON WHY LOVE
We worked hard to survive, learn to love, and be loved despite what we endured being traumatized. We had to go beyond the pain and choose to heal and love instead of hate. If we do not choose healing and…
OPEN TO LOVE AGAIN
“Open up to love again.” I heard the request but could not do it. I had too much pain and betrayal from people who said they loved me. Let people love me again? Allow that wonderful feeling of being cared…
PROTECTION AND FEELINGS
We have been talking about how we protect ourselves. Now, let’s talk about those feelings connected and twisted in us. Our protection system works to keep us protected. It also works to control our feelings from the trauma so we…
PROTECTION SYSTEM EXAMPLES
Trauma forces us to develop a protection system to help us survive. We use any resources around us to help us to keep safe and not be hurt – people, animals, nature, things, places, and internal walls. We use one…
OUR PROTECTION SYSTEM
What is a protection system? We create behaviors, thoughts, and feelings to protect ourselves from the pain of trauma and, if possible, from more trauma. When trauma first happened to us, we were defenseless and blindsided. We learn that to…
LOVE, WHAT IS IT?
This question has haunted philosophers through the ages. Kierkegaard said love should focus on the person being loved first and foremost. Martin Buber said love was something more significant than affect – not a static feeling, but a dynamic state…
ACCEPT WHAT WE CAN’T CHANGE
The Serenity Prayer reminds us to know the difference between what we can and cannot. The healing journey forces us to examine our choices for change in our lives. Here are areas to remember. Life is hard and, at times,…
GOD AND HEALING
Where does God come into the healing journey? Does He sit in Heaven and just watch us suffer? Does He help? Close His eyes? Pretend everything is okay? Laugh at us? Does God even care at all about us and…
HEALING, IS IT WORTH IT?
We have talked about healing, feelings, and choosing to heal. The healing journey is not easy. Let’s look at what healing can mean to us: When traumatized, we often learn we are not okay and do not like ourselves. We…
MORE ON FEELINGS
Descriptions of healing: My healing has been Heaven and Hell. Sometimes when feeling my feelings fully, I want to run away. I know I will die in them or want to, and I know I can’t. Other times there is…